The wedding registry has been by far the most interesting part of Dan (my fiance) and my relationship. Not only have we never lived together, spent more than a solid 6 months in the same place, but we have never agree on anything (especially our decorating tastes!). So my one request for wedding requirements was that we had to go and do our wedding registry before he deployed. Which to be honest with you, he was excited about and he was a huge help....
I on the other hand was completely blindsided (which happens a lot with all of this wedding stuff) on how much stuff there is in a place like Macy's and how much of that stuff you actually want in your house. Seriously, I was out of control with the scanner...I would disappear and Dan would finally find me exhausted with a charlie horse in my right hand as a result. He would have to lure me out of the store with the bribe of coffee and food in order for me to put the scanner down. I'll admit I went a little crazy at the thought of brand new dishes, and kitchen appliances, and new sheets!
In my defense I have never really had anything new (as far as house hold stuff) in my life so I was really excited.
OK now that I have shared my deep dark secret addiction of shopping for my wedding registry I can tell you what I am really trying to get across in this post. What a wedding registry should be about....
For Dan and I it was a battle of merging our lives together without really merging our lives - we were/are playing house. It is a strange thought to pick out china patterns and glassware when we have never lived together or even have a place to live (more on this later). The result? Well it was an experience working out what things we wanted to live with us for the next 80 years together. We had all kinds of people's advice (which is always a blessing) but in the end it was a lesson on tuning out the rest of the world and figuring out what we wanted together. And it got us really excited for the life we are going to start in just a few months.
Now I know that it sounds blissful but it wasn't and there were a couple of freak outs. Like why we couldn't register for power tools at Sears or the $500 massage chair at Brookstone (oh Daniel!). And my convincing him why we should get white dishes and letting him pick out the knives, pots and pans, and the silverware.
We still have words about the fine china...does anybody even use fine china anymore? And if we did have to entertain people who expected fine china I would like to think we would have the money to buy some then? Oh and throw pillows - nothing too bright with flowers. Dan needs to maintain as much manliness as he can.
All in all the registry ironed out a few things that we hadn't even thought would be a problem and everything shook itself out. It was an important part of trying to figure out who we wanted to be as a couple and how we would handle things that we didn't agree on but had to figure out anyway.
But I will let you in on a little secret....when I feel the need for a little retail therapy I do head to Macy's and grab a scanner. The difference is I have a coffee in hand and snacks in my bag.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Great things about my dad??? Well there is a bunch.....
He is a joketeller and a storyteller: First off everyone loves him and he can make a friend just about anywhere, in any situation. He tells old man jokes and loves sports. He's a straight out a funny guy and he has the best stories of growing up in the 60's and 70's (most of them aren't true...in particular the one about who he smoked his first joint with Bob Dylan). He tells big fish stories - literally stories about huge fish that he has caught (which seem to get more dramatic every time he tells them and he uses more hand motions).
He always shows unconditional love - in his own way of course: He came to every soccer game or swim meet or basketball game or track meet I was ever in. It didn't matter if I didn't play at all....he still came to watch me. He also let me move 6,000 miles away when I was 18 to make my own way through life. He checks my oil and windshield wiper fluid every time I come home...that is definitely unconditional love when you have a daughter who knows nothing about cars.
He is one of the funniest people I know and embarrassing too: He made up words and sang them in songs when I was a kid and I didn't realize that they weren't real words until I got into grade school...strange I know. He always farts in the grocery store aisle and then when someone walks by he blames the act on me. When I had boyfriends over the house he would casually say things like "Safe sex is no sex at all" or go on and on about the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me. One time there was a boy that I was head over heels for and had barely even spoken to (oh those were the days!) and he showed up at my soccer game. Don't ask me how my father found out he was there (he knew the name because I had talked about this boy at home) but my dad tried to pay someone in the stands $10 to bring the boy over to him so he could meet him.
He gets life and the bigger picture: I remember when I was in 5th grade and our elementary school had a night for mother's and daughter's to attend together to go over "female adolescent health" - well my mom had to work and she sent me with my dad instead. I had no objection since I didn't know what was going on anyway....well that was until I got there. My dad was the only man in that room and he wasn't a bit uncomfortable. I think he even raised his hand and asked a question about the menstrual cycle. I on the other hand I was mortified - especially when they handed around tampons and my dad told me to take a bunch and hand them out as party favors at my birthday party....he's hilarious isn't he??? But he got that it didn't matter if he was the only man there...it didn't bother him. He was just doing something for his daughter and making it as interesting as he possibly could.
I had to tell people for like a month that my mom had left us just so I had an explanation as to why my father was there instead of my mom.
With my dad there is never a dull unloved moment. He has his own way of doing things but he is an amazing example of love and how to live your life. Thank you dad!